DAY TWO:
Wake
Coffee (mistake)
Water
Stress, no yoga
Green Juice consists of: romaine, celery, cucumber, green apple and lemon
Other Beverages: three cups of Tazo tea so far, water
Thoughts:
Oh. God. You do not want to know my thoughts today. This morning was a massive disaster. I awoke later than intended and in an unconscious moment, grabbed a cup of coffee with cream and sugar! I was 3/4 of the way through the cup before remembering that I was fasting. (Sigh) At least I won't have caffeine withdrawal headaches today, right?
An odd thing, though, this morning - I had no reason to be angry, yet I awoke FURIOUS. Add to that, the cheap-ass Jack LaLanne juicer I have (the second one), was giving me massive amounts of trouble. One blade broke yesterday and the new blade doesn't work as well as the old one. I was stomping and screaming and shoving the veggies into the juicer with such violence that it even frightened my dog. I understand that, perhaps, this cheap-o masticating juicer may not be up to the task of producing 4 to 6 quarts of juice per day. I also understand that I would be much better off with a Greenstar. However, I can't get my hands on a Greenstar for less than $300. And yes, I realize that after purchasing TWO LaLannes that crapped out on me, I could've had ONE Greenstar, but I never have $300 to spend on any ONE thing at any given time.
I am grateful today, however, that my office is sparsely populated this week. Everyone, in fear of losing accumulated vacation time pending some possible administrative changes here at the firm, has decided to make themselves scarce. Fine with me. I need the week to adjust to this fast and I DON'T need the temptation of "Ohhh! Let's go to luuuunch."
One thing that I am surprised about thus far is how quickly I seemed to exhibit symptoms of withdrawal and toxin release. I felt like utter SHIT yesterday. My legs started hurting, I started getting light headed. (And no. . .it wasn't because I was starving. I consume PLENTY of calories in the juice.) The minute I arrived home, I filled up the bathtub full of warm water and Epsom salts and soaked for what felt like an eternity. . .but was really only an hour. I then had to face the rather unappealing task of teaching a kickboxing class. I forced myself to get dressed and go.
I was THEN informed that a friend of my husband's was visiting from out of town and was due to arrive at our house for dinner later that night. . . which totally sucked for me. I watched them slurp down linguine and clam sauce and wine as I sipped more juice. Grrrr. It was brutal. At one point, I thought "Well, it's only the first day of my fast. I could just eat dinner with them and start over tomorrow." But I'm so glad I didn't. The first three days of fasting are the roughest - breaking the addiction to foods that do not serve you well, foods that you don't really need. And the thing is, I know that after 28 days, a return to fresh, raw, wholesome foods will be the equivalent of setting a pizza-lover loose on an all-you-can-eat pie buffet.
Really.
It will.
Won't it?
Truly,
Amy
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
Cleaning House
I will be thoroughly happy to say good-bye to the year 2010. This has been a troublesome time for people in my life. It has been riddled with divorces, separations, deaths. There have also been tiny shimmers of joy: new babies, marriages. But my mother has been suffering health problems, is a new divorcee in her mid-5o's and I worry about her constantly. My office has been thrown into turmoil with a myriad of changes in staffing, tech assistance and salaries (mostly, no one's increased this year). We are all concerned for our jobs, but thankful that we still have them.
Needless to say, I have spent a large part of this year forgetting the good health of the year before. I have spent a large part of this year being angry, disturbed and unsettled. I fell back into a pattern of horrid eating, using television as a means of anesthesia, lost my creativity, lost my joy, gained some weight. I feel that I've spent a majority of the last year devouring poison, knowing it's poison, devouring it nonetheless.
Therefore, I begin this new blog with the hopes of making a brand-new start; even before strains of Auld Lang Syne begin to be heard across the airwaves.
So, as a matter of physical interest AND spiritual interest, I am begining a 28 day juice "feast," and keeping track of it here on my blog. This will involve 28 days of consuming 4 - 6 quarts of green juice (made of kale, various lettuces and other greens, cucumbers, fennel or a green apple here or there for sweetness, a little lemon to cut the wild taste of the greens), the occasional herbal tea, and plenty of water.
It will be nice to just let go of the attachment I have to certain "comfort foods," although, I'm sure it will be tough. 21 days is the longest I have ever juiced. It will be interesting to see what the extra 7 days brings.
I think that this will also be a great ritual to usher in new, more positive aspects to my life.
My immediate goals are more definitive than my long-term goals. For now, my immediate goals are:
1) Get through the next three days without losing it and diving face-first into a bag of doughnuts. The first three days of a fast are always the hardest for me. Day one is tough because I'm just DYING to chew something. Day two is easy, because I still feel full from everything I ate prior to fasting. Day three is hard because by then, the feeling of fullness is gone and I'm in "FEED ME! FEED ME! ANYTHING!" mode.
2) To remember the personal reasons for this fast; to give up all of the excess; to remind myself that there are things we want and things we need and to try to remember the difference between the two.
3) To blog about how I feel every single day of this fast just in case someone out there identifies and relates to this.
My short-term goals are to:
1) Complete the 28 days of this fast without break, without hesitation and without going too nutty.
2) Be happy with my results of the fasting. They will be what they will be - and while I HOPE that I will feel a renewed sense of peace and a reconnection of sorts with myself - if that is not the case, I will need to accept that and move along.
My long-term goals, as a result of this fast, are a little less definitive. I know what I want, but I am not sure that my nature or constitution will allow it to materialize in this way.
See, I would like to return 100% to a raw-vegan lifestyle, though I have had much trouble with being vegan in the past. I have, at several points in life, switched to vegetarian and vegan eating and ended up with health problems no matter WHAT my supplementation. Mostly, I end up anemic and my hair starts falling out. In the past, I have tried supplements, I have gotten help on the best greens that provide protien and iron, I have taken B-12 shots, I have had urine, saliva and "other" samples taken to try to determine whether I have an absorption problem. So far, nothing has helped. I can last anywhere from 6 to 10 months before negative aspects begin to present themselves. I'm not worried about this at the moment, however, as even CHEWING food is 28 days away! I'll worry about it later, as the issue arises again (IF the issue arises again).
I would also like to be a genuinely happy person. I have worked hard, the past few years, at becoming less and less angry. I am the best that I have ever been, however, the stress of the past year has really taken its toll on my "mechanism of joy." That being said, I haven't meditated, practiced tai chi or yoga or even exercised to any degree over, say, the last 10 months. So, I will be adding all of those things back into my life as well.
Generally, these blog entries will look like this:
DAY ONE:
Wake
Warm water and lemon
Yoga
Juice serving: 4 quarts
Juice ingredients: Romaine, Kale, Parsley, Cucumber, Celery, Green Apple
Other Beverages: Water
Thoughts: And here, I'll fill in any thoughts I've had about this process; I'll add anything that I will want to refer to later on. (Which I've kind of done for today, above.)
Ahhh. . .one day into it and I already have caffiene withdrawal headaches and I have to pee, like, every five minutes.
Until tomorrow,
Me.
Needless to say, I have spent a large part of this year forgetting the good health of the year before. I have spent a large part of this year being angry, disturbed and unsettled. I fell back into a pattern of horrid eating, using television as a means of anesthesia, lost my creativity, lost my joy, gained some weight. I feel that I've spent a majority of the last year devouring poison, knowing it's poison, devouring it nonetheless.
Therefore, I begin this new blog with the hopes of making a brand-new start; even before strains of Auld Lang Syne begin to be heard across the airwaves.
So, as a matter of physical interest AND spiritual interest, I am begining a 28 day juice "feast," and keeping track of it here on my blog. This will involve 28 days of consuming 4 - 6 quarts of green juice (made of kale, various lettuces and other greens, cucumbers, fennel or a green apple here or there for sweetness, a little lemon to cut the wild taste of the greens), the occasional herbal tea, and plenty of water.
It will be nice to just let go of the attachment I have to certain "comfort foods," although, I'm sure it will be tough. 21 days is the longest I have ever juiced. It will be interesting to see what the extra 7 days brings.
I think that this will also be a great ritual to usher in new, more positive aspects to my life.
My immediate goals are more definitive than my long-term goals. For now, my immediate goals are:
1) Get through the next three days without losing it and diving face-first into a bag of doughnuts. The first three days of a fast are always the hardest for me. Day one is tough because I'm just DYING to chew something. Day two is easy, because I still feel full from everything I ate prior to fasting. Day three is hard because by then, the feeling of fullness is gone and I'm in "FEED ME! FEED ME! ANYTHING!" mode.
2) To remember the personal reasons for this fast; to give up all of the excess; to remind myself that there are things we want and things we need and to try to remember the difference between the two.
3) To blog about how I feel every single day of this fast just in case someone out there identifies and relates to this.
My short-term goals are to:
1) Complete the 28 days of this fast without break, without hesitation and without going too nutty.
2) Be happy with my results of the fasting. They will be what they will be - and while I HOPE that I will feel a renewed sense of peace and a reconnection of sorts with myself - if that is not the case, I will need to accept that and move along.
My long-term goals, as a result of this fast, are a little less definitive. I know what I want, but I am not sure that my nature or constitution will allow it to materialize in this way.
See, I would like to return 100% to a raw-vegan lifestyle, though I have had much trouble with being vegan in the past. I have, at several points in life, switched to vegetarian and vegan eating and ended up with health problems no matter WHAT my supplementation. Mostly, I end up anemic and my hair starts falling out. In the past, I have tried supplements, I have gotten help on the best greens that provide protien and iron, I have taken B-12 shots, I have had urine, saliva and "other" samples taken to try to determine whether I have an absorption problem. So far, nothing has helped. I can last anywhere from 6 to 10 months before negative aspects begin to present themselves. I'm not worried about this at the moment, however, as even CHEWING food is 28 days away! I'll worry about it later, as the issue arises again (IF the issue arises again).
I would also like to be a genuinely happy person. I have worked hard, the past few years, at becoming less and less angry. I am the best that I have ever been, however, the stress of the past year has really taken its toll on my "mechanism of joy." That being said, I haven't meditated, practiced tai chi or yoga or even exercised to any degree over, say, the last 10 months. So, I will be adding all of those things back into my life as well.
Generally, these blog entries will look like this:
DAY ONE:
Wake
Warm water and lemon
Yoga
Juice serving: 4 quarts
Juice ingredients: Romaine, Kale, Parsley, Cucumber, Celery, Green Apple
Other Beverages: Water
Thoughts: And here, I'll fill in any thoughts I've had about this process; I'll add anything that I will want to refer to later on. (Which I've kind of done for today, above.)
Ahhh. . .one day into it and I already have caffiene withdrawal headaches and I have to pee, like, every five minutes.
Until tomorrow,
Me.
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